Huh?

What does "guaranteed for life" mean? What does "lifetime warranty" mean? What is the lifetime of an object? Doesn't the lifetime end when the thing dies? Then that must mean it is guaranteed for the time it isn't dead. So what's the point?

Bonk

The word "bonk" is the sound you hear when your bumper bumps the other guy's bumper gently. "BONK" is the sound you are glad you didn't hear. The lesson learned here is: Do not allow a bottle of water to get wedged under your brake pedal and then expect the car to stop, even while going very slowly.